Mnemonic games |
|
Putting Fun Into Parenting - By David Stoepker, Psy.D., & Erin Brown Conroy, M.A.Do you remember Dennis the Menace cartoons? Robert Ketchum, the cartoon?s author, often struck a familiar chord with parents through his humorous and honest comic strip. Like the one where Dennis and his pal Joey are playing in the foreground, while Dennis? mother stands in a doorway some distance in the background, red-faced and obviously shouting at the top of her lungs for Dennis. Dennis says to Joey, ?I don?t have to go in yet. That?s not her real angry voice.?Parenting can be very stressful and even seem impossible at times ? especially when children are oppositional. From mild resistance to downright defiance, children often challenge us, stretching our parenting skills and patience. And the odds of our child?s resistance often seem to increase directly in proportion to how much of a hurry we?re in! It?s at these times that few moms and dads describe parenting as ?fun.? Yet fun may be the key to breaking the parent-child stand off. The Benefits of Fun, Humor, and Play Fun, humor, and play are important in raising children for several reasons: 1. Research shows that laughter is healthy. There are actual changes that take place physically, within us, when we laugh. After laughter, chemicals that suppress the immune system drop, infection-fighting agents rise, blood pressure drops, and pain tolerance increases. 2. For children, play is a major form of communicating and learning about life. Play helps to ?speak? to a child in the language that they understand best: play. 3. Humor relieves stress. By creating emotional distance from the stressful event, there is a cathartic release of emotion, breaking the negative cycle in which the child and parent are spinning. 4. Laughing with our child enhances the bonding process. Bonding through laughter can especially be seen in infants ages three to four months, who connect with parents through smiles and laughter long before they?re able to talk. Some research even demonstrates that mothers who laugh more have babies who laugh more. People in general experience a sense of ?connectedness? when sharing a good laugh together. How to Bring Laughter, Play, and Humor into your Parenting If you let your imagination go, you can come up with several ways to incorporate laughter, play, and humor into your parenting. Brainstorm ideas with a group of parents, and your list can be endless. Here are some suggestions to get you started on your way to putting fun into parenting. ? Set aside a time each day (such as after a meal or at bedtime) when each family member shares a joke, riddle, humorous event, or some other funny experience that happened that particular day. ? Occasionally ? and unexpectedly ? walk in on a child who?s busy, smile mischievously, and ask, ?Do you want to hear a joke?? (This is much better than always catching a child doing something wrong and administering a punishment) ? Have a family bulletin board especially for cartoons and jokes. ? Leave notes with a smiling face or with an affirming comment for your child to find. ? Play charades together as a family dramatizing cartoons or humorous events. ? Have a ?family basket? decorated with smiles that every member can put especially funny cartoons, jokes, or riddles. Draw out one or more to read when you and your child need some ?laughter medicine? in your life. Humor to Relieve Stress When children have difficulty complying with a parent because of frustration, tiredness, or stress, it may help to break the cycle with some quick humor. Here are some practical suggestions for taking a U-turn when things are relationally going south and need a turnaround through a speedy dose of humor. ? A parent can call ?time out for a joke? and read a quick quip from the ?family basket? described above. ? If the children are complaining about the food at mealtime, say, ?The next one to complain has to have chicken for supper!? Then bring out a rubber chicken and hang it on the chair of the complainer. ? If your child is slow to brush his or her teeth, wind up a set of plastic chattering teeth and challenge your child to finish brushing before the teeth stop chattering. ? When homework gets frustrating, bring out a rubber pencil or giant-sized pencil to help with those ?big problems.? Giant erasers are also for sale in novelty and gift shops for ?big mistakes.? Recently, I found ink pens that light up to ?shed a little light on the problem.? ? Reading the parent a joke from a favorite joke book can be a reward, once your child has (finally) complied with your expectation or desire. Play and that Challenging (and all-too-familiar) Oppositional Stage of Development Play can be especially helpful when children are going through the oppositional stage of development. The use of playful competition can be an almost miraculous strategy to use for results with a smile. Here are some suggestions. ? If your child tends to resist washing hands before meals, playfully say, ?I?ll finish washing my hands before you do!? If said and done in a clearly light-hearted, playful way, positive competition can work well to help your child along with a smile. This method works great for not just hand-washing, but for any behavior, such as coming to the table for a meal, getting in the car, clicking on a seatbelt, or brushing teeth. ? Simply frame a situation in terms that imply that your child is in control. If your tired child is slow to pick up toys at bedtime, say to your child, ?You can?t make me pick up a toy.? Then let your child know that the game works in this way: Every time your child picks up a toy, the parent has to pick up a toy as well. Once the child is ?into? the game, make it especially fun by begging your child to not pick up any more toys so that you, as a parent, don?t have to pick up any more toys. You can even begin to complain, ?Not again! No, please! No more!? Kids often get a charge out of ?making the parent do something.? If said and done with playfulness, the toys (or other task) will be completed in no time at all. Approaching oppositional children with humor and play (as in these examples) as a matter of routine can remove much stress from the task of parenting ? and save a lot of time and energy, compared to methods of yelling and punishing. A Caution One caution in using humor: Humor must be done in a playful, uplifting way. Avoid sarcasm and hostile humor, which will actually make the situation worse and be emotionally hurtful to your child. A Final Word As a parent, humor is absolutely necessary for your mental health. Keeping a perspective of humor goes a long way for feeling good and acting in a healthy way toward your child. Here are some final suggestions for ways that you, the parent, can maintain a perspective of healthy humor. ? When you?re in a stressful situation, pretend you?re on a television, taping an ?I Love Lucy? show, ?America?s Funniest Videos,? or ?Candid Camera.? ? Smile spontaneously to a stranger and watch their reaction. ? Draw a picture of a stressful event with your non-dominant hand. ? Set up a minimum number of mistakes to make in a day. Humorously keep count. ? Put a note on your keys that says, ?If you have these, I don?t.? ? Finally, if you?re in a hurry, play some appropriate fast-paced background music such as the William Tell Overture. Laugh, play, and have fun with your children. It can make a vast difference in your relationship together. David Stoepker, Psy.D., is a clinical psychologist at Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services in Kalamazoo, Michigan, where he?s worked with children and families for 20 years. For information on his availability for workshops on Putting the Fun into Parenting, send an email to David.Stoepker@PineRest.org. Erin Brown Conroy, M.A., expert author and speaker regarding education and child development, resides in Michigan with her husband and 12 children. For more practical ideas for great parenting, for information on Erin?s book, 20 Secrets to Success with Your Child (Copyright 2003, Celtic Cross Publishing), or to contact Erin, visit www.ParentingWithSuccess.com. Memory Concepts - Keeping Minds Fit - By Janet WalshMemory Concepts Launches Web-based Service Designed to Help Reduce the Risk of Memory LossNew Web Site Offers Programs to Help Stimulate the Mind and Increase Brain Capacity Port Washington, New York ? [DATE] - Memory Concepts, a leading provider of Web-based mental fitness programs and educational resources, announces the launch of MemoryConcepts.com (http://www.memoryconcepts.com), a service that offers mind-strengthening exercises designed to help reduce the risk of memory loss and increase brain capacity. Memory Concepts is at the forefront of helping people combat memory loss and cognitive decline. The company?s Web-based exercise program, Memory Sparks?, takes members through interactive drills and exercises to help stimulate and improve mental functioning from the convenience of a computer. Subscription cost for Memory Sparks is $29.99 for three months or $99.99 for one year. A risk-free one-week trial is also offered. Membership includes a wide variety of other benefits and memory enhancement resources available at the site, including special online events and up-to-the-minute scientific information concerning memory enhancement. Other site features for members and non-members include Cues and Clues?, which offers tips on strengthening memory skills through various daily activities, and the Memory News Network (MNN)?, which provides breaking news, recent trends and regular newsletter updates related to memory loss and prevention techniques. The site is also a comprehensive educational resource for memory-related information. ?As a scientifically based mental fitness program, Memory Sparks involves far more than games and puzzles to help improve memory,? said Janet Walsh, founder and CEO of Memory Concepts. ?Drawing from the world of rehabilitation and cognitive testing, our experts have created exercises that utilize more of the brain?s capacity.? All Memory Sparks exercises are designed and researched under the direction of Chief Science Officer Shane Bush, Ph.D., a board-certified neuropsychologist with a background in brain trauma and rehabilitation psychology. Exercises range in difficulty and are tailored to improve various skills by stimulating different areas of the brain that control cognitive abilities. ?Recent research indicates that regular mental exercise not only reduces the risk of memory loss, but also can improve long-term cognitive functioning,? Bush said. Memory Sparks also provides members with an easy way to track their progress, allowing them to concentrate on improving their weaker cognitive skills. ?Just as one must exercise their body, the brain needs a fitness program as well,? said Walsh. ?These mind stimulating activities should be considered an important component of every healthy lifestyle along with a good nutrition, stress reduction, proper rest and physical exercise.? Memory Concepts is a leading provider of Web-based mental fitness programs for a healthy lifestyle offering mind-strengthening exercises designed to help reduce the risk of memory loss and increase brain capacity. The company, established in 2003, is committed to educating people about mental fitness and the importance of integrating it into their everyday lives. Founder Janet B. Walsh is one of the nation?s leading advocates for individuals and families facing Alzheimer`s disease, and she is a leader in the growing field of memory enhancement. Walsh also founded the Long Island Alzheimer`s Foundation (LIAF) and is the recipient of a Congressional Achievement Award for her work with Alzheimer?s disease. Founder and CEO of Memory Concepts Project index
|